i feel awkward right now. i actually feel like running. (ha, that does not mean that i could run without dying, but i feel like doing it.) and i have this crazy sore throat that came as of like bell 4/5, weird. im probably catching shingles from scott. (i know that has nothing to do with anything, shh. shingles scare me okay!) and amy and i are talking about being 'old souls' and how we will never really fit in growing up. and now i think im going to post all the quote i like from the color purple.

I say, Write.
She say, What?
I say, Write.
She say, Nothing but death can keep me from it.
She never write.

Beat her. I say.
Next time us see Harpo his face a mess of bruises. His lip cut. One of his eyes shut like a fist. He walk stiff and say his teef ache.
I say, What happen to you, Harpo?
He say, Oh, me and that mule. She fractious, you know. She went crazy in the field the other day. By time I got her to head for
home I was all banged up. Then when i got home, I walked smack dab into the crib door. Hit my eye and scratch my chin. Then what that storm come up last night I shet the window down on my hand.
Well, I say, After all that, I don't spect you had a chance to see if you could make Sofia mind.
Nome, he say.
But he keep trying.

But just to choose me, you know, cause nature had already done it. Nature said, You two folks, hook up, cause you a good example of how it sposed to go. I didn't want nothing to be able to go against that. But what was good tween us must have been nothing but bodies, she say. Cause I don't know the Albert that don't dance, can't hardly laugh, never talk bout nothing, beat you and hid your sister Nettie's letters. Who he?
I don't know nothing, I think. And glad of it.

If only I'd understood then what I know now! he said.
But how could he? There is so much we don't understand. And so much unhappiness comes of that.



I is a sinner, say Shug. Cause I was born. I don't deny it. But once you find out what's out there waiting for us, what else can you be?
Sinner have more good times, I say.
You know why? she ast.
Cause you ain't all the time worrying bout God, I say.
Naw, that ain't it, she say. Us worry bout God a lot. But once us feel loved by God, us do the best us can to please him with what us like.
You telling me God love you, and you ain't never done nothing for him? I mean, not go to church, sing in the choir, feed the preacher and all like that?
But if God love me, Celie, I don't have to do all that. Unless I want to. THere's a lot of other things I can do that I speck God likes.
Like what? I ast.
Oh, she say. I can lay back and just admire stuff. Be happy. Have a good time.
Well, this sound like blasphemy sure nuff.
She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folking hoping for him to show. Any God I ever felt in church I brought in with me. And I think all the other folks did too. They come to church to share God, not find God.

It? I ast.
Yeah, It. God ain't a he or a she, but a It.
But what do it look like? I ast.
Don't look like nothing, she say. It ain't a picture show. It ain't something you can look at apart from anything else, including yourself. I believe God is everything, say Shug. Everything that is or ever was or ever will be. And when you can feel that, and be happy to feel that, you've found It.
She say, My first step from the old white man was trees. Then air. Then birds. Then other people. But one day when I was sitting quiet and feeling like a motherless child, which I was, it come to me: that feeling of being part of everything not sperate at all. I knew that if I cut a tree, my arm would bleed. And I laughed and I cried and I run all around the house. I knew just what it was. In fact, when it happen, you can't miss it.

Man corrupt everything, say Shug. He on your box of grits, in your head, and all over the radio. He try to make you think he everywhere. Soon as you think he everywhere, you think he God. Be he ain't. Whenever you trying to pray, and man plop himnself on the other end of it, tell him to git lost, say Shug. Conjure up some flowers, wind, water, a big rock.
But this hard work, let me tell you. He been there so long, he don't want to budge. He threaten lightening, floods and earthquakes. us fight. I hardly pray at all. Every time I conjure up a rock, I throw it.

Then Shug and me go fall in her room to listen to music till all that food have a chance to settle. It cool and dark in her room. Her bed soft and nice. Us lay with our arms around each other. Sometimes Shug read the paper out loud. The news always sound crazy. People fussing and fighting and pointing fingers at other people, and never even looking for no peace.

Pretty soon Sofia say, That funny, I never heard that humming before.
What humming? Harpo ast.
Listen, she say.
Us git real quiet and lsiten. Sure enough, us her ummmmmmmm.
What it coming from? ast Sofia. She git up and go look out the door. Nothing there. Sound git louder. Ummmmmmmm.
Harpo go look out the window. Nothing out there, he say. Humming say UMMMMMMM.
I thinking I know what it is, I say.
They say, What?
I say, Everything.
Yeah, they say. That make a lot of sense.

Finally the fortune cookies come. I love fortune cookies. They so cute. And I read my fortune right away. It say, because you are who you are, the future look happy and bright.
I laugh.

I went and got a piece of paper that I was using for cutting patterns. I wrote her a note. It said, Shut up.

The the old devil put his arms around me and just stood there on the porch with me real quiet. Way after while I bent my stiff neck onto his shoulder. Here us is, I though, two old fools left over from love, keeping each other company under the stars.